And I Can't Stop Having These Visions

A look inside the madness of my mind--sports, politics or daily life--with humor and pop culture and music references embedded.

Monday, December 18, 2006

We're Comin to your City

"Well we flew through Cincinnati..."

[NOTE: Draw a Line in the Sand and then make a Stand - Part 2 will be coming up after this blog].

So for those of you that didn't know, the lyric in yesterday's and tomorrow's blog is from the Musical-turned-Movie RENT! Well, this story starts back in October when I get a call from Jenna. It went something like this...

Andy (sees Jenna on caller ID): Hey, what's up?
Jenna (hysterical): OMG ANDY GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT??
Andy: Uhhh...
Jenna (still hysterical): DECEMBER 16TH OMG OMG OH MY GOD!!!
Andy (scared): Oh um, I dunno, last day of fianls, we're getting drunk?

Well, in case you didn't notice the date, yesterday was December 16th. So, down to Cincinnati I went. Luckily, my new phone came about an hour before I left, so that means we have pictures.

So I head down to Xavier and pick up Jenna about two hours prior to the start of the show, since Jenna said we should go to dinner downtown before we see the show. Which is all fine... except she forgot to mention that Xavier was having a basketball game that night, which increased the traffic, and made me sit in traffic an additional ten minutes or so... Good Job!

So we head downtown and am driving up the street past Fountain Square, where they have an ice rink, and there's tons of people looking up. I'm confused, but I'm looking for somewhere to park, so I ignore it and keep eventually find a place to park inside of a garage. Now I have a Bonneville which is quite a large car... and if you've ever been in a downtown parking garage, they tend to have immensely steep inclines and extremely tight spirals, which aren't exactly easy to navigate.

We park quite easily and then head down the stairwell, which dumps us into an alleyway, and I see the street, so I run to it. There are few places that I'm afraid of. I'll be in Cleveland and I'll yell at people who honk at me while I cross the street. I'll walk around Youngstown in the middle of the night... but Downtown Cinci, Nuh uh.

It was around now that Jenna decides to mention to me that she doesn't know EXACTLY where this place we are going to eat at. So after wandering up and down Seventh street a little bit, I say, "Hey, I have this convenient smart phone." So I pull up Google and search for the Red Fish. Well, low and behold we get there... and its closed. No, not closed for the night. CLOSED for ever. Out of Business. Ta ta for Now. Baby, I'm Ready to Go. See ya later.

First, I take the moment to congratulate Jenna for choosing such a fine establishment to dine at, then we start wandering back around to find somewhere else to eat... in wonderful Downtown Cincinnati. Well, as we are walking, a wonderful gentleman walks up to me and says "Yo man, can I uze ur phone for a sec man. I aint gon run wit it. C Man, you kan 'old minez til im done. aint got no batt'ry left." Being that I have a brand new $450 phone, I was like "No man, it's brand new and I'm scared of lettin anyone touch it." Then Jenna becomes smart and says, "Hey, let's eat here," and drags me inside this bar that we're standing next to so the guy walks away. Thanks Downtown Cincinnati for being such a wonderful place to be at 6:15PM!

So, after he walks away, we start walking towards Fountain Square since Jenna wanted to look at it. Well, we get there and everyone is still looking up. We look up as well, and all of a sudden a spotlight starts shining on the building next to Macy's (which is across the street). What impeccable timing:

Yes, there are 3 Santa's repelling down the building. This just in... Repelling down a building does not count as coming down a Chimney. And yes, waving a Bengals flag is supercool. And by supercool, I mean retarded. Stupid Bengals bandwagon.

Then all of a sudden, they start shooting off fireworks from on top of Macy's. After about 15 minutes, the giant screen on top of Macy's says 'Macy's Downtown Dazzle', and I see that apparently they do this in Downtown Cinci every Saturday evening during December. Quite a thing to stumble-upon.

Around this time, we realize that the show is starting in about an hour, so we decide to eat after the show, and spend the time people watching at the ice rink.
Some of the best pictures include:
Hey, let's not forget about the Jews!
Downtown Cincinnati needs ambassadors...
Jenna: "What's the point of a zamboni?"
Andy: "Well, you see.. Hey, look at that!"

So then we go see the show. It wasn't bad, but I expected more out of a touring Broadway show. Mark had a lisp and tried too hard to impersonate Anthony Rapp. Roger needed more emotion in the first act, but stepped it up in the second. And I felt like I was at a Garth Brooks concert because all of the actors used headset mics.

After the show, Jenna tried getting us lost in Downtown Cincinnati AGAIN, except this time it was 11PM and we were in a car. Luckily, my keen sense of direction, and being able to sense a interstate from miles away kicked in and we successfully got out of the shit hole and went to TGI Fridays.

The night ended uneventfully as I took Jenna back to her dorm, and then I drove back to Columbus.


On a side note, I'm posting my New Year's Resolution early since its relevant to this blog song. I want to go places dammit. In my entire life, I've been to around a total of 8 States, let's see...
  • Ohio
  • Pennsylvania (first two are obvious)
  • Michigan when I was about 4 to visit family
  • Florida (AKA Disney) when I was in the 2nd and 4th grades
  • West Virginia for a funeral and to visit WVU
  • New York during 8th grade trip, but it was to a Six Flags near Niagara.
  • Tennessee for a day in 9th Grade to visit someone I've never met before
  • Georgia for a week to visit family in 9th Grade.
I've obviously driven through a bunch on the way to TN and GA, but those don't count. Well, DAMMIT. I'm 3k in debt, and since I moved into my house, I've spent almost as much on Bonne (counting repairs, gas, and parking passes) as I have on rent, and I've gone nowhere except Cleveland and Cinci and Youngstown and Columbus...

So my mission is to go on an obscene number of trips in 2007. I know Brandon is game. We need 2 more for a full(ish) car. And of course, there will be hilarious exploits detailed on the blog. So give suggestions on where to go on the comments...

My blog will be... Comin... to your city!

Friday, December 15, 2006

Draw a Line in the Sand and then make a Stand - Part 1

"We're not gonna pay..."

Ya, I'm still alive. Not a whole lot is going on in life, but more on that later. (Also, my phone died which means no camera. A new one should be here by Saturday)

So it's rental season again at Ohio State, which means it's time to start looking for a new place to live. I'm not really unhappy with where I'm at right now. I'm overpaying immensely, but I'm literally right across the street from campus. Oh ya, and my landlord sucks.

I'm not sure if it's the window I found hanging off of my roof when I moved in, or it was the fact that the stove and oven didn't work when I moved in. Or if it was the old-school 4-legged shower/tub. Or the leaking faucet in the shower and the bathroom sink. Or the squirrels in the attic (which is my roommate's room). Or the way my downspout on the front of my house won't stay on. Or the way there's a half-finished bathroom in the basement. Or the way they try saying there's two parking spaces behind the house when one is blocked by a giant ass tree, and want us to pay $200/year for EACH. Or the way about a third of my dining room was leaking during a rain storm. (which to their credit they fixed the next day).

Back to that stove. Well, they found a way to shut off the oven (which was the big problem), so at least I could use the stove. Well, that was cool for about 2 weeks, but I was really starting to want an oven. So I'd call them/walk over there about once a week and bug them. They'd come over every now and then, but it still wouldn't be fixed. Finally, I found the owner, and bitched, and about a week later I finally got a brand new stove... IN THE MIDDLE OF NOVEMBER. I moved in August 25th. That's 3 months without an oven.

Oh, and then there's the fact that when it got really cold the other week, my furnace only half worked. So I call them at 5 or so when I get off work, (they're open until 6), and after getting the machine about 20 times, they pick up, and they say that they'll have someone come over in the morning, but all of the maintenance people had already gone home, so they couldn't do anything. Granted they came over in the morning and fixed it, however it was a cold night. This of course relates to the gas bill. Basically, the furnace was creating heat, but not pushing it anywhere. So we had to have the furnace on about 73 for the past month to keep the house warm. Now that it's fixed, I have the thermostat set on about 64, and the house is staying about 68, and that's with half the vents closed. In case you're wondering, that 73 equaled a $242.92 gas bill for November. How wonderful.

You know what... this is getting long. More landlord ranting coming tomorrow.

"last year's RENT, this year's RENT, next year's RENT!"